The comms bounced off the ground with a violent clatter and fell into a bush of mageroyal. All I could do was cry out so hard that I was sure my ribcage would explode. I didn’t want the Thorns to hear, they didn’t need to hear. I screamed for so long I didn’t even noticed the burning sensation in my chest anymore. I also hadn’t noticed the additional shadow creep in next to mine.
“You’re exposed sister”, whispered a voice coldly in my ear.
Fear immediately choked me and I fell forward, attempting to slip into the shadows. An icy hand coiled round my wrist preventing my shift. I couldn’t escape, I had to act fast. I used my free hand to reach for my blade and clumsily clutched the edge. I did not feel the pain piercing the rotten flesh of my palm, instead my attention fell only to the cool touch of the blade placed carefully at my throat. Only then did I have clarity. I no longer felt the thumping beat of the heart that had shrivelled up years ago or the rush of blood that was now ash in my veins. I stopped gasping at the air that had long ceased to sustain me and spoke without fear.
“Kindly remove your blade.... brother”.
I could feel Lasombra smile and the blade slipped away without a whisper of sound. I turned around quickly to face him. I knew too well he could disappear in a blink of an eye, his speed had always impressed and unnerved me at the same time. His smile faded. He knelt down and slipped his hand into the thorny bush of the mageroyal and untangled the comms out of its weave. As he stood up he glanced over the lake to the small village burrowed into the face of the Redridge Mountains. We had torn through it just moments before, showing no mercy to those at our blades. Thorns moved as one. We were a swarm of death and left no life under our dark shadow. It was beautiful.
“Why are you a Thorn sister?”
My mind had been submerged in the bloody dance I had performed in. I stumbled out of it in shock of Lasombra’s stark question, not knowing how to react. Words twisted in my head but none escaped my lips. My eyes darted trying to catch a glimpse of my answer.
“One moment you are a graceful and calculating killer,” he commented with a smirk, “and then you are stupid little girl who would put Thorns in danger with your explosion of emotion”.
He threw the comms at me at little harder than what would be considered friendly, but I still caught them. I inspected the device carefully in my hands, it was clear it had been damaged and would need to be seen to. At first I felt an overwhelming shame swell within me and imagined the Mistress’ disappointment. The swelling then boiled into anger and rage. Who is he to judge me? I had made sure I had left a distance between myself and the Thorns beforehand. He must have stalked after me in the shadows as soon as made my excuses to depart. The only reason to do so was if he didn’t trust me in the first place! I pulled myself together and began to size up to my fellow Thorn.
“I didn’t follow you out of distrust” he murmured.
I suddenly deflated. How could he possibly know what I was thinking? I started to wonder if he had followed me without instruction to do so. What if my Deathmaster had tasked him to? What if the Mistress...?
“I did it out of concern sister. It is clear there is something tormenting you and it is making you vulnerable. What your demons are I do not know, nor do I care to find out. But if I hadn’t silenced your screams you could have been in serious danger.” Lasombra sighed and started to slowly walk back towards the road.
“But you said I was putting Thorns in danger! I was only putting myself in harm’s way!” I had called out to him as his image began to fade in the distance. I had yelled in defiance to try and get the upper hand. He didn’t know me, how dare he undermine me!
Lasombra paused and glanced back at me over his shoulder with a gentle smile. “Yes, I did say that...” his smile becoming a grin “are you not a Thorn then sister?” He turned casually and continued on his route before finally disappearing into the shades.
I stood there alone feeling a complete fool. I hoped the Sun did not see my shame and I slipped into the shadows. Lasombra’s words skipped around in my thoughts, teasing and mocking me. We had taken the oath on the same day, we were Thorns on equal standing.
“Am I not a Thorn then?” The question swirling and bleeding through my heart.
I knew the intense loyalty I had for the Mistress was unbreakable and I would protect my brethren to the grave. Why then did I scream out to the heavens? Why did I feel so lost? Did the cause lie in the eyes of the wretched dead that fell at out blades that day? Eyes filled with hate and malice were once filled with joy and warmth. Perhaps those eyes looked kindly upon me years ago as I played by the lake as a child. I remembered my young friends and our foolish games. What would their eyes say if they saw me now? Disgust? Pity? Sadness? Anger? Vengence?
Perhaps.
Or did I believe my loyalty to my brethren would not be returned? That once again those I trusted with my life would tear in apart and ravage my soul once I had no longer become useful. But the oath, the oath we take, the oath for ourselves and for our brethren...
I thought about Lasombra’s words again and how I was putting Thorns in danger, how I was putting myself in danger as a Thorn. Could it be that the Thorn I fear would betray me would only be myself?
The shadow I had seeked comfort in began to stretch and feed on the land. The Sun had had her fill of the day, a lot of blood had been spilt and it didn’t suit her disposition. Let the night wash over it and hide it under its dark blanket. I gazed up at the sky and my thoughts disappeared amongst the stars. In the silence a faint crackle came from my comms and startled me. But it was a welcome sound, a reminder of who I was. I smiled to myself and rolled the idea of my Deathmaster’s face if I told him I broke my comms in my mind. I would need to start on my journey if I was going to have it fixed before our next gathering. I looked forward to it already.
